i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
