this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
