Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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