I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
