talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
