bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Randomize