question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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