you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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