Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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