I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
