ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
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