this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
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