yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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