I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Randomize
