I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
