i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I think I died a long time ago.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
