Dual....:-)
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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