with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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