More tranny stories later!
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
