i don't like sucking hair
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
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