I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
