I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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