I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
