MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I'm always down for nudity.
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