"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
