Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
