yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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