thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
