More tranny stories later!
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize
