We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
