It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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