Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
