I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
