strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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