I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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