that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
