I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
