Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
stop calling my apartment porn island.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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