If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
