it wasn't lemon gatorade
You're earring is so big in my mouth
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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