420 ftw
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Rumble strips road head = magical
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Such a big mess for such a small penis
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
