whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
