I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
