Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
My life is pants optional.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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