So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
