Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
