Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize