Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
