I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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