It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Randomize
